Stop us if this sounds familiar. It's your turn to host the Christmas family gathering this year, and you're already:

A) dreading the tension at the dinner table,

B) stressing over the dinner itself because you know your mother-in-law is going to tell you how she would've made every dish,

C) and wondering if you can get away with uninviting that one prickly family member you don't get along with.

There's something about the holidays that highlights family conflict. Whether it's ongoing hostility or old disagreements that resurface, sometimes it seems like it'd be easier to write off Christmas altogether.

After all, you can choose your friends, but you didn't get to choose your family, right?

Although that's true... you don't have to be stuck in the same old strife. And the key to getting unstuck?

Forgiveness.

"But they don't deserve it!" you might say.

That's probably true too. But when you think about it, Jesus made the first move and forgave you—before you ever did anything to deserve it.

Forgiving the person who's hurt you is probably the last thing you'd like to do. And you may not be able to restore them to a place of trust, but you can do the heart work on your end to let go of bitterness.

In God's Word, we find verse after verse talking about how to walk through difficult relationships. When you start to speak these verses out loud and make them personal, it begins to change your perspective.

Looking at Ephesians 4:2-3, you can say, "I exercise patience and self-control, admitting when I'm wrong and bearing with others in unselfish love. I make every effort to walk in peace."

Or take 1 Corinthians 13:7 and declare, "Out of love, I look for the best in everyone and remain steadfast in my relationships, even during difficult times."

You can meditate on Luke 6:27-28, saying, "When people do me wrong, I'll walk in a spirit of love, not vengeance. I will choose to love them, pray for them and bless them."

It's not easy to walk in forgiveness. But when you focus on how Jesus has forgiven you, your heart begins to soften. You find the strength to extend that same forgiveness to others.

To help you speak the Word, click here to download this month's Walk in the Word. It's a PDF with a collection of personal declarations based on verses about—you guessed it—forgiveness.

Then don't let these verses gather dust! Print out the PDF, hang it up somewhere and make a habit of speaking the Word out loud. As you do, ask God for the wisdom you need to walk toward healing in all your relationships.

He has already paved the way by forgiving you first!

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